So in my last entry, I said that I was confused about Grad School. It was kind of vague, and that's because I hadn't put into real thought WHAT was actually so confusing. Well this weekend, I did some thinking and I guess I was so confused because the idea had only come to me two days before, It was a fresh and brand new idea. I came across a school in North Carolina and I was suddenly considering it. What you have to understand is, since the beginning of my senior year in high school, i've had no intention of leaving Massachusetts. Before my senior year in high school, I was looking at colleges in Hawaii and California, but then my Papa got sick and I couldn't imagine being far away, in case something happened. That's how I ended up here, at UML. I'm very grateful and I'm sure that my happiness is proof that I made the right choice. But now all of a sudden, I'm approaching the place where I have to make that choice again.
Since May, I've been looking at Northeastern, MSPP and Salem State for Grad Schools. All of which are within 30 minutes of my house. I've talked about living at home and saving money while living with my parents, and these plans were pretty concrete. Well last week, I came across UNC Greensboro and their Counseling program and I was looking around the webpage, and at their Residence Life program, and it all seemed so amazing. Then I started looking at other schools in North Carolina. It's such a gorgeous state, and the weather is beautiful.
I'm very afraid of taking that leap though. Being 12 hours away as compared to the hour (with traffic) now. I've spent the past 2+ years making friends and building all of these great relationships, and I know I'll build more in the next 2 years that I'm here. It's scary to leave that all behind. Plus, what if I get homesick? My freshmen year was spent being VERY homesick, and like I mentioned, I was only an hour away.
But what if I don't take the leap? Will I ever get a chance to just uproot and try something new again? Or will I spend the rest of my life in New England?
It's been tough looking into my fears, and putting them into words, let alone putting them out here in cyberspace for you to read. So I ask you readers, for any advice or input you might have for me. Especially if you've lived it.
Thanks for reading,